#15

flying dream

Copyright (c) 1997 by Annalee Newitz

in my dream, at least, I could carry you
and we flew magnificently
like an invisible airplane
banking and diving in and out of the illuminated fog
as it rose out of the ground in swaths and peaks and sun-sliced piles

they say we don't dream in color
but I've known for a long time that was a lie

how else can you explain the blue evening of the mountains
the dark buttered white of the clouds
and us peach and brown and gold in the middle of everything?

the whole of the air, variegated and empty, clear and smoky,
was open to us

my weird, elusive darling, you must understand when I say
we were truly free
this is how it would feel to be really soaring
I want to show you, to teach you,
to take you along

when I saw you awake today
you were in your usual half-realized struggle

unbeautiful and depressed you talked about leaving and hating
what it is you have been assigned to do with your quenched radiation
you are making the wrong choices because you don't know how to desire, to choose

but I saw another future for you
your body in air your hair filled with light

(no it isn't death it's just a metaphor for coming to life)

5-29-97

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